Into Africa, Day 2: Land of the Rising Sun City

April 1, 2010: Up rainy and early for my first ever game drive at the Pilansberg Game Reserve. They gave us raincoats but failed to mention that the tarp over our jeep was meant to protect riders from sun, not water. While trying (but failing) to keep my clothes dry we got all paparazzi-ish on the animal sightings, and w/ some of the quality of our pictures. Rain rain go away...

A few beasts braved the rain, if not our cameras. Zebras and gnus literally turned their backsides to us. The impalas leaped away. The giraffe wouldn't take time out of eating his leafy breakfast for a decent picture. The lioness stared creepily in the way that I half-expected her to come after us if we used flash photography. And did I mention we were getting wet from the rain?

Funnily enough, after drying ourselves off from the wet safari (and me taking some Immodium) we had breakfast and headed for The Valley of Waves, the Palace's water-themed amusement park. With it's prerequisite artificial beach and wave-generator, water slides, giant inner tubes and lazy river ride, it's a variation of Splash Island, w/ the added bonus of a trampoline ride and a giant pool for actual swimming.

Some of us got tired of waiting for big fake waves to hit us, so we first tried the Temple of Courage, where I slid 17m down and the force of the water landing pushed up my boxer trunks, turning into a T-thong. Moving on to tube and body water-slides, both had open-air and closed versions. The closed tubes limit movement and have u slide down in complete darkness, while the open ones may look safer but actually can turn you around while sliding.

As an endcap to my fun I got in one of those giant inflatable plastic balls, after which they moved me into a shallow pool and I my best hamster impression. Inside the bubble you can't hear anything other than your own voice and the sound your body makes slamming on the plastic as you attempt to stand up straight. They only give you 5 minutes inside the ball, w/c is reasonable because you probably use up that much oxygen laughing while inside it. Whoo, great workout.

We had to rush our lunch a little bit because of scheduled activities afterwards, including archery and clay shooting. Because it was drizzling our instructor, Shadow, handed out plastic raincoats, or as I like to call 'em: sandwich bags.

After managing to give my left arm a couple of welts from releasing the bowstring incorrectly, my aim improved in time and I even managed to get a bullseye 3x in one round (out of seven). As for the clay target shooting, well, let's just say for a gunman I make an excellent archer. Not only did I manage to bruise my right shoulder from the recoil, but sometimes I missed because w/ the protective earmuffs on I also couldn't hear Shadow's commands to shoot. After all of us (except for Carol, who acquired a fear of gunfire alla sudden) got to shoot about 25 rounds well into the late afternoon, the weather only got worse and we had to cancel (but got refunded on) our ATV riding trip.

After some Chinese ('natch) at the Orchid, we were treated to an after-dinner program (or cabaret) at the Sun City Theater: Dancing Queen. If you thought it was a tribute to ABBA (or as Carol thought, a stage version of Mamma Mia!) you'd be half right. Full points if you said "Abba and Queen tribute." (Title was too clever for its own good. Dancing Radio Gaga, perhaps.) Anyhoo it was fairly entertaining, and that almost made up losing at the roulette table twice.

When I got back at the hotel room I soaked in the hot tub, hoping to staving off impeding aching upper body tomorrow.

Into Africa, Day 1: The 'Burgs (UPDATED)

*Logging on from the Le Vendome Hotel in Capetown after I found my netbook inexplicably working again after not being able to do so during my time here in South Africa. That said, gift horse inna mouth and alla that...

MAR. 31, 2010-- On my 13+ hour Cathay Pacific flight from HK to Johannesburg I sat next to-- and had a pleasant chat w/ for a good portion of the trip -- a Canadian who's now living in South Africa, but does business back home working in the mining industry. When I showed him the itinerary he complimented in approval, but like me wondered why we were going to eat at so many Chinese restaurants instead of sampling more local food, w/c he said comprised of a lot of meat. (Guess that answers that question. Where else would we get our veggies?) He shared some tips on ordering said meat for my trip to the Carnivore Restaurant (decline initial offers of beef and pork; wait for the antelope and/or zebra) and shared a cautionary anecdote on local hotel security that involved his wife, a cleaning lady, a missing phone and the cleaning lady's ringing boob when wife dialed the number of said missing phone.

Speaking of digesting, that plastic glass of white wine I had did not agree w/ me. While it's been scientifically proven that one does not get intoxicated faster from alcohol consumption while ( this high up in the air, my nausea and pounding headache is proving to be the exception.

At "Joburg" International Airport we were greeted by a tall lady and gentleman, the latter being Peter, former policeman during Apartheid turned tour guide (interesting career change, for sure).

For my part, I'm sure that if it weren't for the diarrhea and headache (now brought about by the change in land altitude as I'm now at 694m above sea level), the places we visited during the city tour of Pretoria would've received my full attention. Instead I was rubbing my temples and clenching my butt. After the sights and sounds of famous landmarks like Paul Kruger's old house and the Voortrekker Monument currently under renovation, we had lunch at our first Chinese restaurant (Lai Jing) and continued on our 2-hour drive to Sun City.

Sun City is not an actual city any more than Disney World is another planet. Turns out the place had more in common w/ Las Vegas, with a group of 4 hotels and a couple of entertainment centers. We were booked at The Palace of the Lost City and greeted by stoic-looking staff who handed us wine glasses filled w fruit juice, plus a bowl of strawberries. By coincidence BoiT's old classmate Kendreck Chua was also in town and staying here w/ his wife, in-laws and some of their relatives. We checked in, rested a bit and checked out the place. Saw an odd sign by the pool area: Please Do Not Feed the Monkeys. That's the most pressing problem here?!?

After a buffet dinner at the Calabash Restaurant (had my first taste of ostrich neck stew) we exchanged the vouchers the hotel gave us for a 100 Rand single-play chip. Che lucked out by winning big on roulette, her 100 Rand becoming 450 from betting the number of her mom's birthday.

Meanwhile I spent my evening afterwards w/ multiple bathroom visits. (Stupid white wine...)

Into Africa, Day 0

I only have 30 mins free use of the Taiwan Beef Noodle Restuarant's internet service here in HK Airport, so naturally I went to Facebook (ditto the other 2 Pinoy ladies next to me) before logging on here. Flight to Johannesburg less than 2 hours away. The 2-hour Cathay Pacific flight from Manila to HK before that breezed by thanks to multiple viewings of Family Guy.

New plane, new controls, better video-by-demand service. Improved chairs even have sliding seats for leaning, a mini-hanger for your bag, and even an outlet for your laptop to charge in, but it's 110 volts.

Small world rears its way again, as 2 of my companions are Bacolodian Beijinoys --siblings Albri and Che-- who were in the same batch as my cousin AiAi during their China stint, so they know Beyz, Lyndon, Manol and The Contessa.

Currently reading Shootout: Surviving Fame and (Mis)Fortune in Hollywood by Peters Bart and Guber. MP3 function on the celphone has The Ricky Gervais Guide to: The Human Body.

Circle of Jet-Lag: South Africa Itinerary Inna Nutshell

Now if I was a celebrity (or worse, Marlene Aguilar), I'd be worried about posting my holiday itinerary for Holy Week next week, in this case a "South African Sojourn 10 Day Tour" (as it sez on the photocopied folded flyer) w/ 3-Ku, cousins TinTin and AiAi, and their friends.

But I'm not, so here's the breakdownsies:

Total time in the air = approx. 32.5 hours

What's killer is the 13+ flight from HK to Johannesburg (and vice versa a week after), otherwise the other 4 (out of 6) plane rides we'll be taking are a couple of hours each. I smell lotsa naptime.

Total # of lodgings = 4

Sun City Palace Hotel for 3 days, Mabula Game Lodge for 2 days (more like overnight), Johannesburg Crowne Plaza Hotel for 2 days and Capetown Le Vendome Hotel for 4 days. Mabula Game Lodge looks to be the most interesting of the 4, so of course we're not staying long enough to explore "12,000 hectares of malaria free reserve."

Total # of Chinese restaurants we're eating in = 4

Not sure if this is stereotyping the Tsinoy tourists, but lemme put it this way: we don't go to China to look for a Big Mac, so why would we go to South Africa for Chinese food? If it's for "familiarity" or a "taste of home" they're missing the mark. Show me a Jollibee in Johannesburg and then I'll be pleasantly surprised. On the other hand the Carnivore Restaurant offers the chance to taste "crocodile, zebra or giraffe and more. " Guess that's one way to control the safari animal population. Madagascar movie fans may wince.

Total cost of trip= Thank God I'm sponsored, coz at my current salary it would take me over a decade to even consider this.

Sunday, Dopeyz Sunday

Last Sunday half of the original Dopeyz met up at SM Mezza residences in Sta. Mesa to celebrate the 3rd birthday of one of their spawn. That'd be ZAC*, the girl on the right wearing the flower tiara.

The place was one jeep ride away from my house, and this was my first time to step inside the 4-Tower condo spread, where ZAC's 3rd birthday party was being held. When I arrived at the 5th floor (not that I had much of a choice w/their lobby elevator only having 3 buttons: G, 2 and 5) the party was slowly on its way. Mommy Anne and her family are set to move into Tower 3 while final ownership legalities are being finalized, w/c might explain why a lot of apartment doors were still sealed/wrapped in plastic and the inside covered in tacky show-curtains. In the meantime they get to use the "Amenities Floor," w/c houses 2 swimming pools (one swimming, one wading), a huge lawn and party area, and a bar section that was naturally empty since this was a kid's party. Game organizing could've used some improvement but the weather wasn't being cooperative as we were visited by drizzles and strong winds.

While walking around and shooting the breeze w/ Lynette I learned that LRT3 riders won't be getting a view of the Amenities Floor, just the other way around since the place was elevated high enough. (Take that, would-be locomotive peeping toms.) Dopeyz-wise I learned one of us was regretting getting married to who-turned out to be a controlling spouse. (That said, this is 3rd-hand info and non-libelous, but nonetheless intriguing to hear, since I use that Dopey as an example of how even the longest-lasting couplings among us don't end up they way you expected, i.e. together. Eight months is nothing compared to 7 years.)

*ZAC is an acronym of birthday girl's name, w/c I found out too late and had already gotten her an Iron Man action figure. Man, first I miss the kid's baptism, now this.

The Internet: Good for Porn, Bad for Romance.

Two days ago I met w/ a girl I like for coffee. She was running late so I killed the time browsing in-shop mags (though how Cebu Pacific's in-flight mag ended up here, who knows).

Finally she arrived and declined my offer to get her coffee, saying she had a late lunch. In hindsight I probably should have insisted of getting at least a cafe latte, but I was feeling more practical than chivalrous and took her for her word. I also didn't want to break our conversation, so I didn't order, either.

During the chat she mentioned Gymboree, and I said my friend from Cotabato (The Contessa) wanted to work there some time ago. When she asked for The Contessa's last name, it turned out she was "very good friends" w/ her older brother. (Competition? wink nudge)

And that wasn't the surreal part yet, small planet that we have. Just a coinkydink.

Cut to yesterday. On YM I relayed this tale to The Contessa. She said that yes, her brother "mentions her a lot" (wink nudge). Coupla minutes later guess who was texting her brother about a un-coffee date? And asking/telling him about me?

What got my attention was two things she mentioned about yesterday (as least what The Contessa's brother said she told him). WARNING: STOP READING NOW if you think this will take a turn for the voyeuristic. Got it? 'Kay, to continue...

One: I was "too observant" about her Facebook page.

Two: I didn't even order her coffee.

Now, two things I learned from that:

1. Gauging what constitutes as "disturbing amount of knowledge" when it comes to someone else's Facebook page info. I can be the curious and resourceful kind, but for her to be a little bamboozled about knowing common acquaintaces that Facebook itself published? It's not like I was hacking into accounts.

This kind of thing happens to me a lot, where it could start from something as odd as people asking me how I knew when their birthday was (school batch directory, etc.) or wondering how I was able to reach them (Uh, you gave me your card...). The amount the personal information my friends place online is not as odd as their callousness in keeping it unprotected

The impression I got was she was perturbed/perplexed by the amount of mutual acquaintances, even though she brought it up. (Her cousin is Jessel Monteverde, who's my batchmate and related to Mother Lily.) The one that genuinely surprised me was that she knew Aimee Uy from her days when she worked at PhilAm. Including Junius and Darwin, that brings the number of batchmates she know to four. (That said, I know her old batchmate Yvette, and by extension DJ and Goldy. Facebook snooping? No. Deductive reasoning? Yes.)

2. Insisted on buying her coffee.

In conclusion: while no fault of my own, hopefully I didn't blow it.

Ana G's Big 3(Oh)

Pink bear helmet. 'Nuff said.

Just ten hours earlier I came home from Ana Gonzales' 30th birthday party. For someone like me, getting home at a quarter-to-two inna morning from a late-night party held in Makati while my parents weren't out of the country and not unable to buzz/bug me on my whereabouts is about as ballsy an act of social rebellion can be. And for the first time I went stag, an idea that's partly liberating and risky, but came about due to circumstances beyond my control (i.e. my "wingwomen" flaked out).

The party was at 10pm, so I had lots of time to kill beforehand. Had an early-evening swim, got dressed up in line w/ the Pink theme Ana G. wanted (T-shirt for me), then hung out at Diana's place to shoot the breeze and exchange a used tube sunblock for dark chocolate imported from Hong Kong before driving out to Makati (w/ a pitstop for a Chicken McNugget meal).

One thing I like about Makati after 9pm is free parking on the sidestreets, something I don't take advantage of often, since I usually come here much earlier in the evening and park at the malls. But the party's venue at La Maison Condo was several blocks away from said malls, so I hoofed it after leaving the CRV along Legazpi Park.

As my first solo-flight to a late-night party, the term "fashionably late" was something I needed to work on. With bottle of wine and birthday gift at hand, I made it to roofdeck to run into the birthday girl --dressed in a pink halter-top and a white tutu-- and found out I was only the 2nd guest to arrive, next to guest dee-jay Bob. Another guest (human rights lawyer Jessica) was nice enough to pour open and share her bottle of Prosecco. The party's hardly started and already I was feeling a buzz.

It took another 15 mins for the guests to really start pouring in, and speaking of pouring in it was important to hold on to your first plastic cup, as those suckers ran out fast. Some guests were forced to finish whole cans of Red Horse before being able to refill on lighter fare. The place was now divided to a loud dance studio hall for revelry and the balcony for crowded conversing, and I dove in on the latter and managed to mingle w/ gusto. (Also, I may have met more English people tonight that I have my entire lifetime.)

There was the British Biology teacher (name escapes me but reminds me of Brendan Gleeson) who came here 6 months ago w/ his wife Meena (also British but of Indian descent). Francis the English webpage developer who moved here 3 years ago. His business parter Natalie, who lost her beer cup and almost reused someone else's before the original owner stopped her. Carol Sun of Cathay Pacific. Cookie, whose bowtie didn't get as much attention as his pink bear helmet in keeping w/ the party theme. Liz, who quit her job in advertiseing 6 months ago and dreams to work on a luxury yacht. Peter, the second person in the party who thought we've met before (we haven't), then hugged me by the head for some reason. (Pretty sure he wasn't even drunk.)

Anyhoo, I was an hour and fifteen minutes past my "Cinderella Time," and as awesome as staying longer would've been, I didn't. Boo. Hour later my allergy to "excessive" alcohol consumption acted up again. Boo and itchy!

Fulooking Around (An Ad EATremum Event)

For this year's EDSA Anniversary only students got the day off today to "celebrate." Luckily for Irene she works in a school, so she got to "celebrate" by sleeping late and bum around the house. Oh, and get a chance to see batchmates again for dinner.

It seems scheduling a small Batch '94 dinner around Irene's free day was just as good an excuse as any to get it done. (Hell, worked the first time.) This time it was supposed to be at Greenbelt 5, but I couldn't find a place w/ reasonably priced food and conducive for good conversation. Someone suggested Mann Hann, but the one near Glorietta was closed for good, and the main branch in San Juan was spacious but a b*tch to find sufficient parking. I settled for the SM Mezza branch across the street from Centerpoint.

After picking up Mona and Irene, we were the first to arrive at Mann Hann. When everyone else finally showed it was clear that we could not be fit at one table, plus those f#%kers were bolted to the floor so we couldn't move them. So imagine 15 adults, after some chatting and not ordering (but still holding the menus), getting up to leave after one of them explains to the manager that we'd opt to stay if they had longer tables and benches. Darwin's suggestion? Luk Foo Restaurant along E. Rodriguez corner Araneta Avenue. If I knew we'd be this close to my house I might have hosted this dinner there.

We selected Set Menu B, and out came Chinese dishes so unremarkable it was like they wanted to emphasize how less interesting their food was compared to Gloria Maris. But I've said it before: the quality (and price) of the food is secondary to the interaction around the table. Tonight I met Cheryl Dy and Wendy's husbands and Darwin's wife for the first time. Tonight I learned a bizarre rumor concerning the spawn of a couple of Ad Extremates. Tonight I learned almost all of them want to enroll their kids in Saint Jude Catholic School. Poor Irene, more paperwork for her.

School Ties

Free time last Friday found me going to Jehan's office at Tytana Plaza in Binondo to attend a meeting of the Saint Jude Catholic School Alumni Association website committee. (Good luck fitting all that on a business card.) Surprise, surprise, the website's been lacking in oomph and updates. I was there to offer some insight and suggestions, if not actual material worth publishing online. Jehan was nice enough to order Uno takeout for us in the form of various rice topping meals.

Speaking of suggestions, ones like having an open forum board or the site hosting some blogs were tossed around. Nice on paper, but as I told current SJCS AA President Johann Tan, things like a website require passion (or monetary incentive, w/c isn't likely here as the site was put up by volunteers) to keep it going. Hell, I have batchmates unable to sustain a maximum 140-character typing habit, much less updating blogs. And even if they did have the enthusiasm for it, the SJCSAA website would have to compete for attention of those who prefer using Blogger, Facebook and/or Twitter to voice their opinions.

That being said, the meeting was more of coming up w/ material for the site. Sports was a given, w/ all those games the alma mater's been winning (and losing) lately. (Johann was strangely fixated on highlighting cheerleaders.) Another was a monthly feature article of high-profile alumni, or at least those w/ interesting jobs. Tim Yap was mentioned twice or thrice, but I suggested holding off on that idea. He's a friend but it's not like he needs more exposure from us.

For the Features Section, I suggested --as a joke-- someone writing about what it's like marrying a Judenite. After the guffawing died down I suggested a more logical (and possibly less offensive) article would be about Judenites marrying other Judenites, be they of the same batch or otherwise. (Batch '94 has six and counting.)

Next meeting we should have selected someone to do the website's redesign (they're leaning towards Richard, whoever that is).

Thrice of Me to Love, Thrice the Love to Give